One bright sunny morning in 2018, I rounded a corner to find an old woman pissing in front of a family grave.

She was in her late sixties, dressed and coiffed just exactly like my grandmother Lala’s sisters Quela and Elisa. Brown shoes with thick heels, short hair dyed an unpersuasive brown and firmly styled to communicate order. A bright red coat with a faux-fur ruff lent some grandeur to an otherwise staid ensemble: tea-length skirt, cardigan, tan purse with a bakelite handle. The respectable middle-class armor of Chilean women of a certain generation who reach a certain age.

I took none of this in just then because she was, as I said, squatting in the aisle when I found her, her red coat blaring against the gray. Had she fallen? Our eyes met. Her gaze dropped to the camera that sat in my right hand, accidentally aimed at her. My eyes registered the puddle spreading below her. I panicked and fled back around the corner I’d come from. Then I took a second to try to figure out what, exactly, had just happened.

It was my first day in Punta Arenas. I’d never been. It’s a tough, old-fashioned city at the southern edge of Chile and the world, outfitted with handrails along the sidewalks for when the wind gets really bad, which it does as a matter of course: the city is dotted with statues of humans and animals reckoning with its gelid battery. If you wandered its streets on a still day, you might wonder why Chile represents its figures tilted forward with their clothes blown back. I appreciate the approach for how gamely it concedes that circumstances afflicting the beholder might color how we imaginatively invest in those who came before.

I had come to Patagonia for silence and space after Brett Kavanaugh’s confirmation broke the pundit I’d accidentally become. I never really set out to write about politics (I’m a lapsed early modernist. Before that, I studied neuroscience and music). But that somehow became my job. Week after week, I wrote columns about Trump. Culture. Trolls. Gender. The internet. It meant trawling the nation’s most toxic waters for content, but an adrenaline-spiked sense of emergency made it feel worthwhile.

The Kavanaugh hearings—and the roar of discourse around them—collapsed that drive. I considered it, basically, the end. Roe was over. So were decades of flawed but real feminist progress. I was in something very like shock. This was it.

The reason I fled to Patagonia, however, was twofold. There was the shock, and there was the fact that most of my fellow pundits didn’t seem to share it.

Here’s how I saw things back in October 2018: Roe v. Wade was dead. Reproductive freedom was next. We were on fire and no one was coming. It was too late. More broadly, the phase of the American experiment built on shared principles or ideas (even if everyone hypocritically violated them) was over. Republicans acting in bad faith certainly wasn’t new, but the hearing, in my view, was the definitive mask-off moment. No more “just trolling.” No more plausible deniability. Confirmed despite disqualifying conduct on the stand (and off it), Kavanaugh’s appointment was less an evaluation of his fitness than a showcase of how little his fitness mattered. It was a display, by Republicans to the opposition, that the new order was immune to standards, reason, argument, and process. Of course they confirmed him anyway; that was part of the pageantry.

Put another way, the GOP openly declared philosophical bankruptcy at the precise moment it secured what it needed to legitimize the indefensible: an impeachment-proof judicial majority. Real, consequential, history-making repression was on the table. For immigrants, minorities, and also for women’s rights (a battle to which Christine Blasey Ford’s testimony drew particular focus). Trump’s revanchism now had legal backing. To make matters worse, women (and Americans who opposed him) had made Brett Kavanaugh really, really mad. And the new Supreme Court Justice had openly threatened reprisals. “What goes around comes around,” he said in a statement in which he characterized Blasey Ford’s accusation as a malicious political hit orchestrated by his enemies.

I found it hard to imagine a bleaker scenario.

What confused me was how out of step I seemed to be with my fellow news junkies. When I finally checked in that morning, I expected to encounter the kind of widespread mourning we’d eventually see on June 24, 2022, when Roe was finally overturned. But I’d misread the moment; most of the folks I knew and saw online didn’t seem to feel nearly as doomed as I did.

I don’t mean that people weren’t horrified and upset by the hearings. The internet was ablaze with fear and fury over Kavanaugh’s confirmation and how Blasey Ford’s allegation was handled.

But behavior (as childhood educators like to say) is communication. And despite their distress, most like-minded people were making arguments, retweeting gotchas, pushing to pack the Supreme Court and debating Roberts’ respect for stare decisis.

You have hope if you’re doing that shit.

I found it eerie, like watching surgeons squabble over which procedure to try next on a corpse.

Was I catastrophizing? Were they complacent? Who knows.

My point is: I was convinced we’d officially and irreversibly entered a new dark age for women. (And others, of course. But my focus, in this story I’m telling you right now, is women—for reasons I hope will become clear.)

We don’t have great terms for civic grief. But for me, that’s when the mourning began. My neck was an iron ring, my throat narrowed and made my voice tight, as if going on a pointless strike against speech. I was paralyzed and furious and totally out of words.

All the words people poured out—I kept thinking about women tweeting painful stories about abortions and miscarriages—had failed to move the needle. I hated that they told those stories. Pearls before swine. Blood before swine. I seethed at everyone post-gaming the hearing as if the version of the world we knew hadn’t just ended. Had I the means, I’d have put everyone on mute and mandated the minute of silence no one seemed inclined to give.

It is unreasonable, and not a little despotic, to wish to mute the world. A change of scene was called for.

The day it happened, Aaron and I drove to a reservoir in the Sacramento delta he had written about in a piece on water and California.

He chose well. It was exactly the right sort of arid, alien landscape for a catastrophizing pessimist like yours truly to stare at while processing that forced birth was back. The barrenness was almost a comfort, even though I was struggling with barrenness myself.

I did not let a tomato I found growing wild in the cracks interrupt these profitless reflections and ruin my metaphor. In no mood for hope, I ate it.

My point here, again, isn’t that I was right about any of this. I’m not sure I was. (Though I made a case for how it might happen, I was caught totally off-guard by Biden’s victory in 2020). I’m just trying to describe an inflection point that put me out of step with the zeitgeist and made it hard to do my job. My feeling, rightly or wrongly, was that there simply wasn’t anything more to say.

That’s bad, if you’re a pundit.

Politics writers are supposed to say things.

Argue. Synthesize. Pronounce. You’re supposed to pretend you’re not writing basically the same piece, in response to basically the same news, for the fifth or ninth or eighteenth time. You’re supposed to talk about what this means, and how it’s different this time, and how it might sway things in November.

There have been points where I believed writing mattered. This wasn’t one of them. I did not want to read. I did not want to speak.

I especially did not want to write. Because the only thing worse than losing all hope is talking about it.

Despair is a bummer to read, boring to write, and risky. If you’re persuasive, you might demobilize someone with ideas. Or momentum. Or belief. Think of the thousands of terminally online wits who’ve quote-tweeted “and you’re surprised?” at some poster who made the classic normie blunder of straightforwardly lamenting something awful Trump did. I’d sooner cut off my typing hands than drift anywhere near that snotty, self-flattering strain of political anomie.

Mariame Kaba says “hope is a discipline.” I was not disciplined. But why spread paralysis? Better to go somewhere new. Stare at empty space.

Patagonia seemed good for that. Most of my family is in Santiago, but I was sick at heart with this political depression, or whatever it was, in ways my relatives there might find hard to understand or just plain silly (“puf! where’s your sense of proportion?”).

With good reason. Chileans are way, way ahead of Americans on this particular journey down Fascist Lane. They went through their period of extreme political polarization in the sixties and seventies. Salvador Allende, a socialist, was democratically elected president in 1970 and then overthrown by a notorious military coup in 1973. Democracy returned in 1990, but Chileans have spent the last four decades sitting with the reality that slightly less than half the country embraced its bloodiest, most authoritarian chapter. As late as the 1988 plebiscite, 43% were still in favor of keeping Augusto Pinochet in power.

And everyone still has to live with each other.

43% is not a small number, as most Americans now understand (that happened to be the floor of Donald Trump’s base of support throughout most of his first term and some of the second).

And yet, for many, many years, I found that Americans tended to handwave that Chilean 43% stat away whenever I brought it up. Which I did, not to defend the dictatorship, or deny that some corrupt bookkeeping might have slightly inflated that figure, but rather to point out that fascism is rarely as unpopular as we might wish. Nor does it go dormant, or die when the dictator does. (Jose Antonio Kast, the recently elected, pro-Pinochet Chilean president, won the second round of the 2025 election with 58% of the vote.)

People didn’t want to hear it. In hindsight, I think it ran counter to what most of us think we understand about authoritarianism.

Anyway. I couldn’t whine to my relatives about the whole thing. And everything Americans said online seemed to me like part of the problem. Even the frequent comparisons to Chile, which politically-minded people on both sides (myself included) just can’t stop making. Chile’s curse might be that it’s too useful a case study. A combo Rorschach test, case study, utopia, and boogieman, it’s such a funhouse mirror for US (U.S.)—such an interesting testing ground for our pet theories, imperial self-hatred and narcissism—that it’s hard to learn anything else about it.

I felt, to be blunt, chata. Fed up.

I wanted no people — not-people. The opposite of people.

I tried to think of unpeopled spots. Surely, I thought, the emptiest place on Earth has got to be a cemetery in Patagonia.

The bus ride from Punta Arenas to Puerto Natales has much to offer the female misanthrope in want of silence. The Andes flank miles and miles of gorgeous emptiness punctuated by flamingo-flecked ponds, the odd sheep and clutches of sassy guanacos. Magellan called it Tierra del Fuego because of the Selk’nam bonfires he saw burning on the shore, but there’s a helluva lot more ice than fire, and the hushed ride through all that nothing felt like chugging water in a desert.

That’s the good news.

The bad news is that the graveyard I wanted to mope in was hopping with people loudly preparing for the following week.

Like an idiot, I’d unwittingly timed my visit for the weekend before All Saints’ Day. A.k.a, the second-busiest weekend on the cemetery calendar.

The Cementerio Municipal Sara Braun is a big imposing place with sweeping vistas and gigantic trees shaped hard by the wind and then smoothed by human effort. The plaza across the street was lined with kiosks selling flower arrangements and decorations and food. People were respecting the dead with savage, cheerful pragmatism: whitewashing gravestones, trashing old flowers and faded plastic figurines, pressure-washing the dirt off catacombs.

These visits were loving, of course; no one casual about the past spends their weekend cleaning and scrubbing headstones. But it all seemed, to my mind, heretically festive: The blaring radios and garbage bags clashed in tone with the more solemn pilgrimages families would make later in nice clothes and polished shoes.

I briefly wondered which kind of companionship the dead might like more, but the answer was obvious. Reverence is flattering but the noises of life and garbage are better. (I can say that: I am writing even now in a quiet room, more than a decade into infertility caused by endometriosis.) (And I can say that again now, two years later, with baby twins babbling in the room next door.) (And now again, that they are toddlers, learning this week how to walk.) (They’re expert climbers now. As I update this paragraph, hopefully for the last time, I’m gazing at a koala-like creature named “Real the Ghost” one drew, and a very silly portrait the other made of my grandmother, Lala—whom he has never met, and whom I’ve barely mentioned, but whose framed photograph he stole from my mother’s house and carries companionably from place to place. “Here, Lala,” he says, setting her on the piano stool before he joins her on it to bang the keys.)

The cemetery is—like so much else in Chile—segregated by class. The mausoleums are quiet, buffered by air and space. Poorer Chileans rest bone and ash in the posthumous equivalent of apartment buildings, stacked one on top of the other. Cramped but companionable. Cosmopolitan. (The provinces have more space, but in death, anyone can be a santiaguino.)

Wandering the middle-class corridors of the single-story graves in search of an epic view, I finally found one: the hill of the cemetery swooped down the city and bam into the ocean. You could fantasize about sliding down Punta Arenas into the sea.

I was doing just that, with my camera out in search of another angle, when I rounded the corner and found the old woman crumpled in the aisle, clearly—pretty clearly—peeing.

Had I seen what I thought I’d seen? I wondered, from the corner to which I’d retreated. Floating above the gravestones I saw the torsos of parents, the heads of children. This lady was out in the open. Any one of them could have glanced over the crosses and made her.

Maybe her back hurt as mine sometimes did, I thought. Maybe she just needed to rest it as I have done—inelegantly, while visiting museums, smashing myself awkwardly against a wall and eventually sliding down it until I’m basically squatting just to give the curve of my lower back (and my inflamed, endo-wrapped insides) a break.

If it was urine, and I absolutely planned to check, maybe she just had to go? Old age? Couldn’t wait? But if so (I reasoned), she’d surely have retreated to where I was standing now—a sheltered corner just a few feet away, protected from view. Not the middle of a highly-trafficked aisle.

I peeked round the corner. My grave-pisser was walking away. Primly, with the choosy gait of a window-shopper at the mall.

A young woman with two children headed toward her swathed in harried motherhood—that early middle phase of it. I saw them pass the puddle, which was still steaming. They did not recognize it for what it was.

And indeed, what was it? I thought, a little giddy now, walking up to the scene of the crime. Because it was becoming clear to me that whatever just happened here should not be understood as an accident: It was a gesture intended for some member of (I looked up at the vault) the Vargas-Gualas, who would no doubt be coming with all the rest of Punta Arenas to tend their family grave.

I’d craved solitude. But this was, undoubtedly, better.

To catch an avatar of female respectability pissing in revenge feels otherworldly because the act is so radically uncivilized. Almost unthinkably feral. Reckless. Primitive.

I don’t know who her message was for: an occupant of the vault, one of its caretakers, or the family writ large. I doubt the family would recognize the liquid in front of their mausoleum—which might, in any case, have dried.

But I do know that, to a woman of experience, whether the message was received in the intended spirit sometimes matters less than the fact that it has been decisively sent.

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My political depression wasn’t and isn’t an original problem. Climate activists, for instance, have been mourning the death of hope for decades while most of humanity parties on.

In the years after Kavanaugh’s confirmation, I kept working while wandering through a kind of pundit wilderness, seeking models and mentors for dealing with various strains of political grief. Like Pat Maginnis, the ornery and egoless abortion activist my ex-colleague Josh Levin arranged for me to interview who (at ninety!) endured me grilling her over what it felt like to watch all the progress she worked toward begin to crumble. The last time I saw her, she was wearing a Hard Rock Cafe sweatshirt she’d found on the street and wryly holding a pitchfork.

Or (why not?) John Milton, who channeled his crushed political hope and revolutionary fervor into “Paradise Lost” and “Samson Agonistes.” As a fellow grump, I respect that he infused the curdled misanthropy that plagues many a post-activist with a little sublimity. I’ve come to think of the flood of references in his poetry as not just hopeful but actively medicinal. Maybe he, too, needed to step out of his own time for an antidote to the dull and stupid tyranny of the present.

There’s solace in stepping out of your own time, sheltering in a hurricane of associations, and putting some very weird things next to each other just to see what sparks. What happens (conceptually I mean) if you liken the defeated rebels in your epic poem to the fallen autumnal leaves of Vallombrosa? Vallombrosa, of all places! Or if—in a blog post on democratic collapse—hope dawns at the sight of an old woman pissing?

(Aaron, when I mention that the leaves of Vallombrosa have cropped up here: “and how exactly does that illuminate the question of female agency in failed political states?” I explain, excitedly, that most of the trees in Vallombrosa aren’t actually deciduous. “It’s pines and firs!” There’s a beat. “Don’t you see? Their leaves don’t fall!” I say. “It’s a trick simile!”

Another beat.

“MAYBE SATAN NEVER FELL!”

“Well,” Aaron said, “this is going to save the family.”)

I believe in burrowing into the past for solace and perspective. But there’s value, I suspect, in really stepping into your own time too—without the luxury or the protective mantle of professional obligation. (I have none, since the Washington Post laid me off along with over three hundred colleagues earlier this year.) So I’m doing it. Even though, as of this writing, I’m technically a triple threat of vestigial authority: ex-scholar, ex-pundit, and ex-TV critic.

Here’s the thing about those very good jobs I was lucky to have: They’re subject-specific. You’re not really supposed to talk about Chile or your grandmother’s wedding when discussing seventeenth-century broadsides or the Supreme Court or “The Pitt”.

But … are we not human? Maybe there are very good reasons one should!

So for now, the job is writing without compartments. As a person, not an expert. And it does have to save the family. (Dear god, I have 4-year-old twins and I’m in my forties. Please subscribe!)

So, this is a turn inward? A retreat?

I could be wrong, but I think—and hope—it’s the opposite. Something more akin to (dare I say it) integration? Figuring out what it means to take the news … well, personally. As a full rather than professionalized self.

It’s funny. Years ago, while grimly shopping to improve my life, I realized that none of the self-helpy journaling apps I was dejectedly considering had a “what happened today in the world” slot.

I don’t know if that’s still true. But at the time, users were encouraged to chart what they ate and how long they slept and log what made them happy or sad and what they were grateful for and their creatine and water intake and how long they planked while meditating. But virtually none left room for the possibility that world events might affect your mood. Maybe there was a space for “social media,” which lightly suggests addiction (or “doomscrolling”) in ways that minimize true events by treating them as digital distractions.

The subtext was: you’re not supposed to be personally affected by current events.

I found it odd. Especially with therapists sinking under the volume of patients struggling with “political stress”.

How are we supposed to feel?

Look, I don’t know if I felt the “right” way about Kavanaugh’s confirmation. And I don’t know how much what Trump says and does should affect a person’s mood.

It’s undeniable, however, that livelihoods and nations are affected. The world can’t afford not to pay attention to an unraveling superpower, but many burned-out, formerly engaged Americans have actively changed their news consumption habits, sometimes opting out entirely as psychic self-defense.

That’s perfectly understandable. But it’s not ideal. And it’s not responsible. Tempting though it might be to ride it all out etherised upon a table (and that is extremely tempting), I think, maybe, at some point, we have to find a way to talk about—and process—political pain.

But taking the news personally also means I’m not opining in these pages as any kind of authority. For critics and pundits, part of the job entails acting like your take or your taste matters more than someone else’s. That won’t be happening here. I mean, I know some stuff and I’ll use it when it seems relevant. I expect I’ll be following—and reacting to—my fair share of news and TV shows and stupid controversies. But what I’m offering here isn’t expertise; it’s specificity and, hopefully, pleasure. The content won’t always necessarily be fun, but it should be fun to read.

There might be lists. Threads or stories I’m following. Subreddit fights. Screenshot collections. Internet rabbitholes. Essays (don’t worry; most of ‘em won’t be as long as this one). Weird facts or phenomena worth looking at or asking questions about.

Take takedown

Something was lost, I think, when the Take^TM won the discourse wars. First, the good old Montaigne-style “essai” turned into blog posts, which bifurcated into subject-oriented thinkpieces and confessional ragebait pitched to get everyone fighting over the state of the author’s soul. Longform has since mostly died, leaving, as sole victor, the dumbest genre of them all: the Take. Sure, it’s snappy, supercilious, and definitive. But I think we can all agree that as an approach, it’s pretty played out. So for awhile, at least—in my capacity as a longtime (but now reformed) Discourse Warrior—I’m making a rule: no arguments.

None? That seems a little extra?

Yeah. Maybe it is.

I do love a good argument. I’ve made many. The trouble is, their usefulness is limited, and you can tell when someone’s been making them too long. Take-masters get facile. Confident. Bored. And the stakes stop feeling real. Comedians stop laughing at clubs once they reach a certain level because they spot the machinery early. Arguments are similar, for those who must make them professionally: They’re fun, highly defended, thoroughly artificial constructions fashioned to mask the true course of human thought. Rarely do they honestly reflect the way we process data—or the real reasons why we arrived at the conclusions we did.

Rhetoric isn’t real thinking. It’s epistemological makeup.

That might be why AI is so good at aping it.

If arguments are persuasive and fun at their best, at their worst, they let us coyly reverse-engineer rational paths to conclusions we arrived at through other means. We all know there are secret, private, unflattering reasons we think what we think. People would find us unserious or even contemptible if we ever confessed them.

They’re still the reasons we think what we think, though. That’s the problem.

Human irrationality is literally driving us to the brink at this very moment. Are arguments really supposed to save us?

That was admittedly an argument against arguments. I shall not contradict myself again.

(That is a lie.)

What happens after

Congratulations! You have arrived at the portion of this that is about insane asylums.

To explain why an old lady pissing in a cemetery was the cathartic endpoint of fleeing to the Strait of Magellan to escape the Kavanaugh hearings, I need to show you this photograph of my great-grandmother, Filomena Urriola Salas, as a new mother. She’s holding my grandfather, her firstborn son Fernando. Her eyes are soft with hope.

The other pertinent facts are these:

• Filomena was rich—very rich indeed—when she married my great-grandfather, Valentín.

• She had two children with him: Fernando and my great-aunt Inés.

• Valentín kicked her out of the family home shortly after Inés was born. “He found her unfit for his bed,” Inés told me. “Ya no le servía para la cama.”

• He would spend the years that followed squandering the family fortune on sex workers.

“Since he wanted nothing to do with her,” Tía Inés says, “she took me, as a newborn, to live with her in Tía Emilia’s convent in Valparaiso.”

Inés and I are talking over Whatsapp. She’s in her nineties now, and confined to her bed. Her mind is sound but her hearing is poor. Whenever she can’t hear me, her oldest son and devoted caretaker, my Tío Gerald, gamely bellows my questions into her ear. The recording of this is accidentally hilarious.

“Her … her convent?” I yell.

Apparently so. Yes, Filomena’s aunt, Emilia Urriola de Valdés was a major donor for a complex on cerro Placeres that included a church, a schoolhouse and “Reformatorio Femenino,” which was her main interest (and would eventually be named after her as the Instituto Emilia Urriola).

They were that kind of rich.

For the first three years of her life, Inés lived in the Reformatorio with her mother and aunt; Filomena saw her little boy, Fernando, whenever she could.

It wasn’t easy. Having miserably wrangled infant twins in public places, I relate deeply to this blurry shot of Filomena trying to settle baby Inés on a public bench while spending some time with the little son she’s been separated from. He sits scowling next to her. Look at the set line of her mouth. And his. Yup.

“Mi mama sufrió mucho,” Tía Inés says.

Unbeknownst to her, Filomena’s time with her daughter was also coming to an end. On a day Valentín knew Filomena would be in Santiago, he kidnapped Inés, who was then three years old. “I never lived with my mama again,” Inés said. She was brought home to live with him and his sister, Beatriz.

Not, it seems, out of any particularly sincere attachment on her dad’s side. “He said I was ugly when I was a year old!” Inés cackles. She is not sentimental.

From that point on, Filomena was allowed to see her children on Wednesdays and Saturdays. “She would take us to lunch at a nice restaurant on our visits with her,” Inés says. “But she’d always invite any kids we passed along the way who happened to be working in the street, so we were usually joined by a couple of lustrabotas (bootblacks).”

I’m having a hard time with the idea of being parted from one’s three-year-old. So here’s a photo from before that happened, of Filomena and Inés in front of a silly painted backdrop.

I was so thrilled when I recently found this. Nice, in a way, to imagine the two of them sailing away.

Then Filomena died.

“When I was twelve, my father and Tía Beatriz told me my mother had passed,” Inés says. “They gave me her Singer sewing machine as a keepsake.”

I don’t want to write this part

I keep trying to find stuff to add to this “before” section because I don’t want to do the next bit.

Filomena wasn’t dead.

She’d been locked up in the Casa de Orates—the insane asylum in Santiago (which was renamed the Hospital Psiquiátrico).

Filomena lived there for two decades.

Inés grew up thinking she had no mother.

And the only family Inés had left—her dad, her aunt, and her older brother—lied to her about it on a daily basis.

Yes: My grandfather Fernando, the bright-eyed baby pictured with Filomena above, knew his mom was at the Casa de Orates. He visited her there. He wasn’t just complicit in helping his father and aunt conceal the truth from his sister. He did something considerably worse. (Stay tuned.)

Inés was thirty and pregnant with her third child when she learned her mother was still alive.

Gerald, her firstborn, sometimes says his mom stayed a little girl all her life. I can see why, and I sometimes wonder whether some aspect of her development stopped at twelve, when her family presented her with that sewing machine and a life-altering lie.

Here’s the last photo she ever took with her mom. It wasn’t a happy time either, of course—they still lived apart—but Inés looks so healthy in this shot, so vibrant and capable of taking whatever life has to throw at her. Matter-of-fact in that great, little-kid way.

Whenever I get too precious about my own political heartbreak, I think about this image, which splits time into a sad “Before” and a genuinely cataclysmic “After.”

The after, of course, is what interests me. What do you do after.

(Those are the sorts of questions Chileans can help Americans think about too, of course: the long aftermath.)

“Tía,” I said. “What did you do? When you heard she was alive? Did you confront them? Did you ask your brother why he did it?”

“What could I do?” Inés replied. “The minute I heard, I went straight there and brought her lunch. Her dress was thin. She looked cold, so I brought her a cardigan.”

“Y como fue ese encuentro?” I asked her. “How was the reunion? How did she react?”

“Estaba feliz, puh,” she told me. “Fernando had told her I’d never come to see her in all those years because I was a whore.”

Filomena died nine months after their reunion, in 1958.

I’m well aware of the horror any feminist-minded reader will likely feel after this story. I know what it looks like. But I’m trying to resist letting it sink into the vast record of crimes against women in black and white photos. I want to drag it into the present and make us all stare at it as if it just happened.

Here’s why: letting it sit in the gray, neatly classified as the typical patriarchal abuse of yore, or whatever, is about as constructive as calling Donald Trump a fascist.

I mean, sure? Yes. Agreed.

But the inquiry surely can’t end there. Given what might be coming, we need some granularity. We need to ask more. The details matter. The agency people exerted—or didn’t, or somehow manufactured out of thin air—matters.

So does making sure the story actually is what it looks like: a monstrous husband incarcerating his wife after stealing her fortune, her children and her freedom. (Columnists love a juicy, representative anecdote that conforms to expectations and proves their side is right. Tidiness is best, as there aren’t always enough column inches to go into all the pesky details.)

I’m trying to do my due diligence here. Maybe Filomena had some issues? Plenty of people in my family might benefit from a diagnosis or two. Could she have had PPD?

“Tía,” I ask her. “Is it possible she belonged there? Was there anything actually wrong with your mom?”

“NADA,” she says. “It was all manufactured by Tía Beatriz.”

Beatriz?!

Well, fuck.

Beatriz was Valentín’s sister. And, unlike Valentín, whom Inés described as “un cero,” she was highly capable.

Beatriz never married, but when Valentín ran through all his wife’s money (and failed to finish his degree in architecture, or work as an accountant), Beatriz was the one who got a job and supported her brother’s family while also taking care of their mom.

She got a great job running the Preventorio San Luis in Santiago, a sanatorium for children with tuberculosis. She knew doctors. She knew government officials. She was connected. And my grandfather Fernando was the apple of her eye (she didn’t care much, one way or the other, about Inés).

“She could get people locked up,” Inés says. “And she did.”

Tío Gerald tells me Beatriz waited until Filomena’s mother had died, which left her pretty disconnected from any family support. That’s when she made her move. “Era maquiavélica, Lili,” he tells me.

Beatriz succeeded on her merits, alone, in a man’s world. She supported her deadbeat brother. She was generous to my mother. She helped sick and penniless children. Kind of a feminist icon, really.

“You’re sure she was the one, Tía?” I say, watching the narrative I’d been chasing evaporate. “Beatriz stuck Abuela Filomena in the Psiquiatrico?”

Gerald is understandably a little annoyed since he’d just told me that himself. But he’s a good sport, and obligingly shouts my question anyway.

“Oh yes,” Inés says. “What’s more, when Liliana left my brother, she tried to do the same thing to her.”

“WHAT?”

Liliana is my grandmother. My Lala. The center of my young life—the second one I lived in Chile, anyway, which always existed in parallel to the one I live here, in the States.

“Claro,” Inés says. “She wanted the kids.”

I know I’m nosy, but I don’t expect these sorts of conversations to pop out of history and thwack me in the nose. Sure, I knew my grandparents’ split was bad; so bad that my mom and her brother had to be ceremonially handed off to the other parent at the courthouse, in front of a judge.

But this feels like a Psycho-level twist. Lala is woven into every aspect of the first half of my life. She was so soft you sank into her. Her voice was hoarse and low from cigarettes but she radiated ease, which somehow leached into the cozy, misshapen sweaters she knitted. People stopped in to see her every day—just to say hi, joke a bit, sip cola de mono out of a tiny chipped glass. She was always delighted, as if she’d been expecting them. She seemed lazy; her movements were slow. She was a beast at canasta and loved showing me the scariest illustrations from Hell in The Divine Comedy, a book so fancy it had a latch. “Look!” she’d say. “Their heads are floating in a river of poop!” She’d tell me horror films, beat by beat, while we sat together on the beach. She introduced me to Agatha Christie when I was eight. I didn’t know, until I was much older, how weird it was for grandmothers to act like best friends.

If Tía Beatriz had gotten her way, she would have raised my mom. She would have been … my grandmother. Lala would have become something else. I don’t even know who I’d be.

Here’s a photo of Tía Beatriz (left) and the woman she didn’t manage to lock up.

My mom seems shaken but skeptical when I inform her of this bombshell. I can tell she doesn’t quite believe it. She loved Tía Beatriz. Her memories of her are warm. Beatriz bought her lovely clothes, and the Preventorio San Luis was like Disneyland for her and her cousins when they were small: They had the run of the swimming pool for the sick kids. And the giant, gorgeous park.

Lala did not love Beatriz. She called her “un veneno”—poison—once. But she never told me this.

(Why didn’t she tell me this?)

“No le resultó, claro,” Inés croaks, of Tía Beatriz’s effort to get Lala sectioned. It didn’t work.

Inés’ voice is giving out. I know we need to stop. Even though I want to know, very, very badly, why it didn’t work. These aborted stories are, I suspect, the ones with the most to teach us.

I didn’t know, at the time, that this would be the last conversation Inés and I would ever have.

I want to know what happened to Filomena—whose family was fantastically rich and powerful—that made it possible for her to surrender so completely to her own incarceration. As far as I can tell, she never asked to be released.

I also want to know which mechanisms allowed my grandmother Lala (who was middle class) to escape Beatriz’s snare. Sure, power is part of the answer. But it isn’t all of it.

Collateral damage

In all the tumult, I’d neglected to ask Inés how she found out her mom was alive. “Liliana was the one who finally told me the truth!” she says. There’s no edge, only relief in her voice. She seems nothing but grateful.

My feelings, after we hang up, are more mixed. “Had Lala and Fernando separated when she told you?” I ask before we hang up. Inés confirms. So: Lala knew, and kept Filomena a secret for a good long while before finally looping her daughter in. I’m thinking, privately, that if Lala’s marriage hadn’t ended, Inés might never have seen her mom again.

This seems unjust. And grubby. It bugs me. Lala wasn’t grubby.

I want to know so badly why Lala didn’t tell Inés the truth much sooner. It drives me batty that I can’t ask her.

It hurts my feelings, too, that Lala and I never talked through this shocking chapter about Beatriz’ plot to get her declared insane and usurp her kids. The one thing making me doubt that whole story is that, if Lala knew of it, she’d surely have talked about it all the time. She relished villainy and would, I think, have dined out on the story of how thoroughly she foiled Beatriz’s plans.

There’s an expression in Chile, “hablar a calzón quitado,” that captures the unguarded way people can confide in each other, and try on ideas, when there’s trust. Literally, it means speaking with your underwear off. Figuratively, it means speaking frankly, candidly, without the usual defenses and hypocrisies—a bare-assed communion of the heart. Lala and talked that way a lot. Not about feminism or politics (those were more gladiatorial engagements) but about my love life. Her marriage. People we wanted to understand. What living is for. Our scariest flaws. And (sometimes) ghosts.

I did notice she didn’t like talking about Filomena. I was so curious, but she was uncharacteristically tight-lipped. She did tell me once that Fernando never once brought her to the Psiquiátrico to meet his mother. Inés confirms this. She adds a story Lala would have loved: Fernando did bring his second wife, Hilda, to see her—until Filomena firmly ordered him to stop. “She couldn’t stand her. I only ever wanted you to bring Liliana, she told him.”

It’s the only story I’ve ever heard in which Filomena put up any resistance at all to anything.

I know, too, that everyone had (and has) their reasons: Lala for not telling me, Fernando for keeping her away from his mom, Filomena for giving up. People usually do, and they’re awfully interesting if you can get people to talk about what the real ones were, a calzón quitado.

There’s another statistic about Chile I sometimes bring up because I find it weird; weird enough that the reasons for it deserve careful unpacking. It’s this: Allende won the 1970 election fair and square, but he only received 30.5% of the women’s vote.

I’ve spent decades studying my female ancestors in a baffled effort to understand why they are how most of them are: personally quite formidable, with cultural attitudes that border on female supremacy, despite being (for the most part) politically conservative. I want to know why they worked to uphold standards that formally subordinated them; why they (like the majority of Chilean women) have tended, unusually for Latin America, to be more right-leaning than their male counterparts. Why they strenuously defended marriage even though—in those quieter, calzón-free moments when they were most themselves—several bitterly lamented the path not taken. Divorce wasn’t legal in Chile until 2004, so the battleground of their lives is strewn with broken marriages that couldn’t die. I want to understand their mistakes but also the rational, very calculated compromises they made while navigating patriarchies capable of flattening them—and the ways they defined resilience, and happiness, and defeat, and success.

For one thing, I’m curious. For another, it seems useful to think about what we might do and what to avoid if hope dies. And about how personal—as opposed to structural—power circulates. And where the anger goes.

I haven’t had anything to say for a long time. Now I do.

Here is Filomena as a young woman, before she got married:

Here’s Inés at roughly the same age, a decade or so after “losing” (but indeed losing) her mother. Also before she got married (that union ended too).

Here’s Lala before she married Fernando:

And here, walking primly past the sinful dead, relieved, finally, of her burden, is the woman who peed at the Cementerio Sara Braun.

I was a fool to seek peace in a graveyard. Even if it hadn’t been under siege from an incontinent avenging fury—on the weekend before All Saints Day, no less—silence was always out of the question. Cemeteries aren’t empty. They’re stuffed.

Why are plots always sinister?
Why always proud to be a sponsor?
Why stay the course and never lose hope?
Running away is perfectly fine, why be so beholden to tropes?

...

My contribution, as you know well, was a result of none too subtle blackmail
For when you passed me in Times Square in the company of that discreet female
You remarked, "Fancy seeing you here my dear uncle in these streets"
Hot pink. Just as she wiped the telling smudges of lipstick
An understanding, an agreement in your eyes to not sing like a bird
Still, proud sponsor, it rankles, even as I've kept my word

...

Now now, there's a perfectly innocent explanation
No need to make a drama out of this situation
Some go with double lives, lies and fabrications
I rather prefer the subtle art of omission
Not another word more, no one needs to know
Loose lips sink ships, careful as you go
And prefer strategic silence instead of playing the improviser
Default deny is a straightforward policy, there's nothing sinister

...

Life lessons, it takes a village, and all that talk
A proper education. Lean in. Stand strong. Walk tall
Think. Buyer beware. Hell hath no fury
Also: le silence n'est pas un oubli

Compromising Situation, a playlist

A soundtrack for this note (spotify version)

• Say Nothing by Omar
• Don't Explain by Billie Holiday
• Man of the World by Peter Green
• It's a Man's, Man's Man's World by James Brown
• Busted by Ray Charles
• Le Silence n'est pas un Oubli by Orchestre Les As de Benin
• Situation by Yaz
• Busted by The Isley Brothers
• Compromising Situation by Elecktra
• Silence is Golden by Franki Valli & the Four Seasons
• Blackmail by Donell Jones
• Busted by Stephanie McDee
• Man of the World by Eric Clapton

File under: humour, life, lies, culture, observation, perception, betrayal, language, Observers are worried, poetry, toli

Writing log: June 1, 2023

In May, hearing a routine case, the Chief Justice of India remarked from the bench that the country had “youngsters like cockroaches”: young people who, finding no work, become media people and activists and attack everybody. He called them parasites of society.

Within a day, a 30-year-old graduate had founded the Cockroach Janta Party (CJP), a straight parody of the BJP’s name. Membership criteria: unemployed, lazy, permanently online, and able to complain professionally. Slogan: Voice of the Lazy and Unemployed. Within three days, the account gained 3 million followers; within five days, it surpassed the governing party in followers; and by July, the total reached 22 million.

On 25 July, India’s Education Minister resigned; the first time in 12 years of Narendra Modi’s government that a street movement had removed a member of the cabinet. The organization that removed him was eight weeks old; it had no members, no funds, no offices, no registration as a political party and no program beyond satire.

That is what needs explaining: not the resignation, which was a tactical retreat, but how a joke acquired the power to extract one.

The immediate cause was an examination. In May, the paper for India’s national medical entrance test was leaked and sold in advance to some of the 2.3 million candidates competing for roughly 130,000 places. It was canceled and re-held six weeks later. This is not an isolated scandal; around 70 public examinations have leaked in seven years, affecting 17 million candidates across 15 states. Exams in India are now an industry: testing contractors, printing firms, transport handlers and a coaching sector are drawing 200,000 teenagers a year to one provincial city, and each link is a place where the paper can be sold.

On 6 June, the students occupied Jantar Mantar, the only legally permitted protest site in central Delhi, and refused to leave. An activist held a hunger strike for 26 days before police removed him to hospital against his will. On 20 July, some 20,000 tried to march on Parliament and met barricades, batons, tear gas and a government-ordered internet blackout. Five days later the minister was gone.

That the minister fell at all is the real puzzle. Modi’s government has three responses to opposition, and all three have worked for a decade.

The first is delegitimization. The movement was declared anti-national and foreign-funded; its account was blocked on national security grounds; and television anchors arrived at the usual hypothesis about foreign money. The students replied by filming solemn confessions that China had wired them 60 rupees for bus fare and Pakistan 40 rupees for lunch — about R17 in all. The smear was not defeated so much as digested.

The second is prosecution. India’s Enforcement Directorate, a financial-crimes agency, opened cases against 193 politicians in a decade and obtained two convictions. Conviction was never the objective. The process is the punishment: the summons, the frozen assets, the years in custody before trial, and the standing offer that the file closes if the politician changes party. It disciplines people with careers and property to protect but it is powerless against nineteen-year-olds whose grievance is that they have none.

The third is waiting. Protests are expensive; students run out of money; heat and boredom finish the job. This failed because supporters from other cities and countries ordered food to the site through delivery apps, and a movement distributed across 22 million accounts cannot be outlasted at one address.

What remained was force, and force was the error. The baton charge of 20 July produced the images that turned a student agitation into a national one. Coercion is effective when it is either invisible or total; however, when it is filmed from four angles and applied to young people whom the government’s own rhetoric describes as the pillars of a developing nation, it instead serves as propaganda for the opposing side.

Nor could the government do the thing it does best: redefine opposition as a religious minority in disguise. Earlier movements were coded as Muslim or as Sikh separatist. This one had no such marker. Its base was small-town, aspirational, exam-taking and overwhelmingly Hindu — the ruling party’s own recruiting ground.

None of this explains why so many were willing to fight in the first place. In 2025, India grew at close to 7% and, inflation ran near 2%; meanwhile corporate profits stand at record levels. Yet the connection between economic growth and the people who are supposed to benefit from it has broken down. Fewer than 7% of male graduates find permanent salaried work within a year of graduating; around 40% are unemployed. India has expanded higher education far faster than employment, deliberately, because degrees are cheap for a state to supply and jobs are not. The result is a surplus population of the credentialed: not yet proletarian, but losing the security their parents had and aware of it by nineteen.

This is why the explosion occurred over an examination rather than a wage. The state has stopped promising work, but it still promises fair competition for the little that remains. That promise performs a precise ideological operation: it takes a shortfall produced by the structure of the economy — 130,000 places against 2.3 million applicants — and reassigns it to the individual as a verdict on their worth. The unemployed graduate does not experience an economy. They experience a judgment on themselves, delivered by an apparently neutral procedure. In this way, those who are surplus to the economy experience their exclusion as personal failure and humiliation.

The leak destroys that operation. Once the paper has been sold, the credibility of the exam as a neutral mechanism is undermined, the verdict is exposed as a transaction, and the shame changes address: it stops being mine and becomes theirs. This is why an exam scandal detonates where an unemployment statistic does not. The leak gives the young the standing to be angry; and standing, not information, is what mobilization requires.

It would be easy to compare this with the youth revolts elsewhere and note that India sacrificed a minister, whereas others produced fallen presidents. That scoreboard is worthless. Those movements broke governments. This one confronted a fascist regime: the largest party membership of any political organization on earth, resting on a century-old cadre movement present in tens of thousands of villages, a captured broadcast media, a tested legal apparatus, and something with no equivalent in Kathmandu or Antananarivo: a hegemony that has already organized much of Indian youth into its project. A president who flees is not evidence of a deeper rupture than a minister who resigns.

The settlement itself measures almost nothing: the government conceded a person and kept the structure — no reform of the testing agency, no enforceable examinations law, and nothing about employment. But outside the negotiating room, an examination scandal has become a national argument about work. In Bihar, police fired on crowds, baton-charged in the state capital, and published photographs of a hundred protesters, inviting the public to identify them. In response, leftist student organizations organized a general strike that closed rail and road traffic across the state. On 10 August, the central trade unions and the farmers’ movement filled the jails nationwide on an eleven-point charter, with 12,000 arrested in one small state alone. Days earlier, a seat the governing party had held since 1995 fell to a newcomer in the city where repression had been heaviest.

What broke was not the regime itself, but rather the impression of its permanence; in a formation of this type, that impression is not merely decorative but an integral part of the power structure. This is what leads an editor to self-censor before receiving any calls, a businessman to determine that silence is more cost-effective, and a young person to decide that obtaining a visa is the most sensible option. Twelve years went into building it. It has now been filmed failing.

That permanence rested on more than repression. It rested on an offer, too. What exists in India is not an illiberal drift but a fascist formation, which maintains power through both offers and force. To those it cannot employ, the governing movement sells majoritarian pride as compensation for the absence of a wage: no job, no future, but the nation is yours and you may despise whoever is not in it. Millions have accepted that trade. This is why arguments based on statistics often fail to resonate.

The students made a counter-offer. Told from the highest bench in the republic that they were vermin, they took the word, wore it as a party name, and denied anyone the right to classify them. That is dignity. It is grounded in what one is owed rather than in whom one is licensed to hate, and it is the only currency in which a formation like this can be outbid. The Indian Left surrendered that ground when it decided indignation was unrigorous, and it has been losing ever since: zero state governments, a parliamentary presence rounding to nothing, and a generation with no memory of it as a force.

Nothing in the students’ demands was attainable inside the existing arrangement. A fair examination is unavailable without dismantling a private testing industry. Jobs are only available by confronting a model that has produced a decade of profits without employment. These young people did not begin from class analysis; they arrived at its doorstep by taking the state’s own promises seriously and following them to where they broke.

That is not yet a class movement. But this situation demonstrates that a connection can be made by anyone willing to link the graduate’s blocked ladder to the informal worker’s absent floor. On 10 August the unions and the farmers were already in the street.

Delhi is obviously part of something larger globally, but the list of recent youth revolts around the world is not homogeneous. There are three distinct families in it.

The first are revolts against a stolen count. Georgia has been in the streets for well over 400 consecutive days since October 2024, demanding fresh elections and the release of political prisoners. It has obtained neither — only more restrictive laws, hundreds of detentions and a failed attempt to storm the presidential palace. Mozambique’s post-election protests ran five months and cost close to 400 lives; Chapo was inaugurated regardless, and the sequence closed with an amnesty for protesters rather than a recount. These movements ask that a vote be re-counted, which an incumbent who survives a count will never accept.

The second are revolts against the cost of living, and they carry a signature this magazine’s readers will recognize. Kenya’s 2024 uprising was against a finance bill written to satisfy creditors. Nigeria’s #EndBadGovernance protests followed a fuel-subsidy removal and a currency collapse, in a state spending some 74% of federal revenue on debt service. These are, in substance, revolts against structural adjustments administered by domestic governments on external instructions. Kenya’s young people forced the bill’s withdrawal. Nigerians were met with treason charges carrying the death penalty against 76 people, including 30 minors, as young as 14; several collapsed in court after months of malnutrition in adult jails.

The third are revolts that took the state: Bangladesh, Sri Lanka, Nepal, and Madagascar. A quota scheme, a corruption scandal or a social-media ban becomes the trigger; the government falls within weeks; and the movement discovers it has no capacity to govern or even to bargain over what follows. Six months on, most of the substantive demands raised in Nepal and Madagascar remain unmet.

India does not fit neatly into any of these categories. The CJP demanded something else: the integrity of a distributive procedure. In doing so it went, without any theory, straight at the mechanism by which mass exclusion is converted into personal failure.

What unites the cycle is not a generation. It is a global condition: economies that grow without absorbing labor, states that have replaced the promise of employment with the promise of fair competition for scarce entry, and debt-service regimes that squeeze whatever remains. These movements do not solely represent the grievances of young people. They represent the political expression of the effects of structural adjustment on the aspirational classes, with young people the first to experience its impact.

What also unites them is a shared limit. Leaderlessness defeats infiltration, decapitation and prosecution. But it also defeats negotiation, continuity and succession. The characteristic that prevents a movement from being beheaded also makes it impossible to bind that movement to an agreement or to transform it into something that endures beyond its dispersal.

Where that energy is released and nothing is there to receive it, the organized right is usually better placed to harvest it than we are. Brazil’s June 2013 remains the standing warning: an ironic, leaderless revolt over bus fares that won its demand, dissolved, and left a field that, within three years, belonged to Bolsonaro.

So the question India’s cockroaches pose is not whether such movements can win. They can, and this one did, against the hardest target in the set. It is whether anything exists to receive them when they disperse. Nothing was ready in Delhi this time. The next one is coming, because nothing that produced this one has been touched. And the only useful question for the Left, in Johannesburg as much as in Patna, is what we will have built by then.

Outside the courthouse waiting, cameras at the ready
Perp walk in prospect, vultures killing time
Jaded, one of the photographers explained
"We're basically waiting for people that don't want their picture taken..."

The nannies with their ruddy charges seeking the shade in the plaza
Grandma demographic, patiently observing, tiring them out
Who knew that Haitians had so many blond toddlers?
Homeless man conversing with the invisible crowd
A righteous lecture on grievances continuing and past

Eyewitness news WABC-7 New York
Truck and supporting cast, reconnaissance
Photogenic correspondent, hair piece steadied, swank
Checking angles, anticipating, the video man readies the camera
"This is federal, once they've got you in their sights, game over"




Court lets out, the morning session is over
The lawyers on their break, gray suits suitably somber
Homeland Protection Services crew fall out, looks of relief
The old man emerges, and could it be? Ooh, his daughter

Then the rush, furtive as he exits the courthouse
Coverage, first spotted by the indie stringer as he moves to the left
Caught, unexpected this development, indecision
Now the dance, the choreography begins
Questions hurled as they all move to the right
Telephoto lens activated, daughter lets out a yell.
He falters, stuck mid-street, then moves right, resigned
Can't avoid it, they have to walk through the plaza

Outrage and shame cross the face of the daughter
Shame and more shame on the part of the father
Click, shutter, click, more questions
He stutters - big mistake - and starts to answer
Ooh, this is a live one here
Protests vehemently, "We will appeal."
Passing the homeless man whose patter suddenly becomes distinct
"This country was never innocent... Repent"
Click. Gotcha, all in a day's work

Soundtrack for this note

• Plaza de Toros by Larry Young
  Featuring Grant Green and Elvin Jones. The album is called Into Something.

...

Timing is everything
Observers are worried

File under: culture, observation, life, city, media, Observers are worried, poetry, toli

Writing log: June 1, 2023

Welcome to all the new subscribers who have joined us over the last couple of days. This is our weekly newsletter that, as the title says, tries to share stories about Nigerians in Nigeria and around the world doing things you may have missed. Goes out every Saturday morning at 10am UK time.

This week on 1914 Reader, I wrote about my original research into the Nigerian national honours system and what I found looking into more than 2,000 awards going back to 1963. I also looked at the upcoming Dangote Refinery IPO’s prospectus (I’m still an accountant!) and shared my thoughts on it.

Enjoy the week’s selection of stories below

Nigerian Media

It seems that a guy in Kano was murdered over his social media posts:

A quick check on his social media handles shows that Dan Shagamu was fond of posting selfie-recorded videos of him commenting on various issues.

In his videos, he literally attacked everyone ranging from politicians, traditional rulers, opposing religious groups to his neighbours. This, according to analysts, could make each of the groups he attacked potential suspect in his killing.

A resident of the area who preferred not to be mentioned confided in Weekend Trust that beyond what is in the public, residents of the area suspect that he could have been be involved in something that made his neighbours uncomfortable.

The source said even the account that he shared in one of his videos in the past alleging threats to his life over an encounter with a small child wasn’t normal.

He said, “There is no way everyone in the area could turn against a person unless there is something underground. He had a good relationship with little children who are always after him, which made people suspect that the relationship wasn’t normal, hence the hostility.

“But nobody could substantiate the kind of relationship with them. He was also living alone in his house after his divorce. He asked his six children to leave the house for their grandparents’ after he alleged there were threats to his life, saying he should rather be killed alone than with the children. That was why when he was found killed in the house, he was alone,” the source added.

He also said late Dan Shagamu’s life represented a paradox: outspoken on social media, but reserved and with limited friends in reality.

Daily Trust

27 deaths from a drink elsewhere will be huge news but in Nigeria there is always so much going on that stuff like this usually passes below the radar. And why is the official focus here for it to “die down”:

The death toll from the incident involving residents of Odigbo Local Government Area of Ondo State has risen to 27, as the state government has commenced a crackdown on the sale of herbal drinks and other unapproved substances in the affected communities.

PUNCH Metro reports that residents of Araromi Obu and Odigbo town had reportedly fallen ill after consuming substances suspected to be herbal drinks, with 24 deaths initially recorded in the two communities.

The Chairman of Odigbo LGA, Taiwo Adegoroye, told our correspondent on Thursday that the number of deaths had increased to 27.

Adegoroye said eight people had earlier died in Araromi Obu, while 16 deaths were recorded in Odigbo town, adding that the situation had since subsided following the intervention of medical teams from the state and local governments.

He said, “The number of deaths is now 27, but if not for the proactiveness of the medical teams from the state government and the local government, the death toll would have risen further. But we thank God that the situation has subsided.

“Today, the task force has moved around the parks, markets and streets to enforce the ban on the sale of herbal drinks. As I’m talking to you, a number of them have been seized.

“The environmental and health teams of the state government are already in town, carrying out investigations. I’m sure very soon it will die down.”

Punch

Very bizarre story. 87 year old?

The Adamawa State Police Command has arraigned an 87-year-old man, Dahiru Garba, for allegedly attempting to murder an Area Court judge in Fufore Local Government Area of the state.

According to a statement issued on Tuesday by the command’s spokesman, SP Suleiman Nguroje, Garba allegedly cut the hand of the presiding judge, Hon. Dauda Hamman, with a cutlass.

The statement read, “On 31st August, 2026, there was mild drama at Mayo-Ine Area Court, Fufore Local Government Area of Adamawa State, after an 87-year-old man, Dahiru Garba of Korawa village, allegedly cut off the hand of the Presiding Judge, Hon. Dauda Hamman, with a cutlass.”

Nguroje said the incident occurred while the judge was presiding over a case involving the suspect and one Ismail Yusuf.

He said, “The suspect attacked the presiding Judge with a cutlass and severally cut his hand, causing him grievous injuries.”

Punch

For as long as humans have been moving around, water has always been the cheapest form of transportation so its important to be clear about what is driving this:

At the waterfront of the popular Ose-Okwodu market, Onitsha, located at the bank of the River Niger, boat and canoe transport business thrives. The Canoe park there is always busy with paddlers, and their loaders make brisk business.

They work daily and make money to sustain them and cushion the effects of economic downturn.
It may be assumed that the present economic downturn in the country, coupled with the high cost of both formal and informal education prompt many young men to embark on boat and canoe paddling business so as to make ends meet, despite the high risk associated with it.

But some of the young peddlers dismissed that, saying it is a choice they willingly made. They dismissed the issue of risks, insisting that water transport is much less risky business than road transport.

According to them, the issue of high risk is not really real, unless for those who failed to wear life jackets and who do not know how to swim, who are vulnerable to losing their lives by drowning in case of the canoe capsizing and in the absence of divers and a rescue team.

The canoe paddlers maintained that it is cheaper and safer for travelers to go by canoe or boat than to travel by road to their various destinations.

According to Friday Idakwo, a 20-year-old canoe paddler and an indigene of Kogi State, “we charge about N4,000 per passenger traveling from Onitsha in Anambra State to Kogi State and vice versa, but road transporters charge as high as N15,000 for the same journey by road”.

Idakwo, popularly known by his fellow paddlers as “Mammy Water Boy Friend” because of his efficiency in swimming, explained that there is little or no risk for a passenger to travel by water when compared with traveling by road.

He said that in water transportation, there is less delay, there is no police extortion, no task force harassment, no armed robbery attack, no kidnappers or criminal Fulani herdsmen to fear, and no auto crash on water as witnessed on highways.

Vanguard

News from Mapo Customary Court:

Grade A Customary Court, sitting in Mapo, Ibadan, Oyo State, has asked a couple, Kayode and Michelle, to go their different ways on account of irresponsibility, clubbing and excessive drinking.

Kayode stated that Michelle had proved to be irresponsible from the first day of their marriage, adding that she lacked all the virtues he expected to see in a woman.

The plaintiff explained that he and the defendant had been together in their marriage for five years, but that they had nothing to show for it.

According to Kayode, Michelle had been unable to conceive, despite various efforts and measures taken in an attempt to have a child.

He added that, to his chagrin, his wife, instead of being sad for not having a child, went clubbing.

The plaintiff added that the defendant went to club every day and always got drunk.

Kayode explained that the more he tried to make Michelle see reason, the worse she became.

The plaintiff stated that he could no longer bear the embarrassment caused by his wife’s behaviour.

He thus prayed that their union be dissolved.

Michelle refused to make an appearance in court despite been served court summonses.

Kayode, in his testimony, said, “My wife and I got married in April 2020 and I paid N25, 000 as her bride price.

Tribune

Truly an amazing story. And of course it was started on Tiktok, which is a completely different part of Nigeria:

The Federal High Court in Abuja has sentenced a fake spiritualist, Solomon Odigie Moses, to one year in prison after he defrauded an Indian woman of $1,100 and recorded her during a private spiritual bath.

Justice C.N. Nwabulu sentenced Moses on Tuesday, September 8, 2026, after he pleaded guilty to a one-count charge of cheating and impersonating a spiritualist.

The Economic and Financial Crimes Commission, EFCC, said Moses was arrested in Ekpoma, Edo State, after obtaining the money from the Indian woman, who had sought spiritual healing.

The commission said Moses used a fake TikTok account to pose as a spiritual leader and received the $1,100 through his Zelle payment platform, after which the naira equivalent was paid into his local bank account.

The EFCC said Moses later deceived the woman into taking a nude spiritual bath, which he recorded without her permission, before threatening to make the video public unless she paid him.

Daily Post

A story you’d typically read about America, not Nigeria:

A 13-year-old boy, Mubarak Mohammed has died after allegedly pulling the trigger of a loaded Dane gun in Udubo village,Gamawa Local Government Area of Bauchi State.

According to the Bauchi State Police Command, the tragic incident occurred on Saturday, September 5, 2026, at about 4:30pm, when the teenager reportedly entered the room of a 35-year-old hunter, Suleiman Hamza, after the latter returned from hunting.

According to the Bauchi State Police Command, Hamza had allegedly left the loaded Dane gun inside his room before going out.

The teenager was said to have picked up the firearm and pulled the trigger, causing it to discharge and inflict fatal injuries on him.

The incident was reported to the Police at about 8:45pm by a 50-year-old resident of Udubo village.

Following the report, detectives attached to the Gamawa Police Division immediately mobilised to the scene and evacuated the victim to the General Hospital, Gamawa, where a medical doctor on duty confirmed him dead.

Guardian

Non-Nigerian Media

Which one of you is earning £400/month from Nigeria?

Darya Simanovich could be described as “having it all”. The serial entrepreneur not only manages several businesses but also runs her own string of companies while juggling three children. But late-night working isn’t part of her routine.

Darya’s secret is not getting up at 5am or hiring a nanny. Instead, Darya has chosen to outsource less desirable aspects of her life, leaving her free to be a listening ear for her growing children while keeping up with her impressive career.

“When I was first pregnant in 2012, I was worried about fitting everything in after the baby was born,” says Darya, 38, who lives in Chelsea with her children aged 14, 11 and 9.

“Then a friend suggested that instead of hiring a nanny, I could get someone to do the tasks I’d rather not do, such as cooking and cleaning. That way I could spend quality time with my baby. It seemed like a great idea.”

Darya employs a virtual assistant based in Nigeria to help with personal admin, freeing her to focus on her job and entrepreneurial ventures, including running Chelsea Swim Spa and her property management company. This sets her back £100 a week for approximately 10 hours of support.

Telegraph

This piece about Chimamanda Adichie and the death of her son in Nigeria is truly harrowing to read:

Esege said the doctor had urged him not to call Adichie until the hospital could do a CT scan, but he replied that he couldn’t keep the information from her. He texted his wife and asked her to come back, and she returned around midnight. In the next few hours, Nkanu’s heart stopped at least two more times.

“So they basically are doing cardiac resuscitations on this poor boy for more than four hours, until 8 in the morning, when they decided to call it,” Egese said. “Nkanu, our son, was gone.”

It seemed that Esege’s theory about the timing of Nkanu’s death was not one he had shared with his wife. Adichie looked at him, incredulous, and asked, “So, sorry. We don’t actually know when our son died?”

She paused and then said again, in disbelief, “We don’t know when he died.”

Turning to me, Adichie said, “I’m actually hearing this for the first time. Some of it.” She then referred to Esege by his nickname. “I didn’t know about IV’s conversation with the doctor when I went home to try to get the payments for the ambulance. I think IV’s tried to protect me.”

New York Times

This story has broken containment:

A social media influencer allegedly wanted by Nigeria over drugs trafficking died after having penis enlargement at a clinic in Bangkok.

Igho Ubiribo, known as “Ego”, who lived in Shepherd’s Bush, London, died in early March from a pulmonary embolism caused by a cosmetic injection into his penis.

An inquest confirmed “genital hyaluronic acid injection” as a medical cause of death.

Ubiribo, 43, who was born in Sapele, in the Delta State of southern Nigeria, had built up a reputation as a glamorous jet-setter on Instagram, where he had 186,000 followers under the name “Ego2222”.

He posted photographs of himself and his wife, Daniella Simba Allen, a Zimbabwean designer and socialite, in luxury hotels around the world, often posing in yachts, helicopters and supercars.

They were also accused by Nigerian authorities of recruiting teenage girls as drug traffickers.

An inquest at Westminster coroner’s court last month heard how Ubiribo had gone to the clinic in Bangkok for penis enlargement treatment on March 5. He received injections of hyaluronic acid, a filler commonly used in cosmetic procedures, and lidocaine, an anaesthetic.

Later that day, while having a massage at the Marriott Hotel, he complained of severe chest pain and collapsed.

He was still alert when taken by ambulance to Samitivej Hospital in central Bangkok, but lost consciousness before a CT scan could be performed. He was given CPR before being pronounced dead in the early hours of March 6. The post-mortem examination and toxicology tests determined the cause of death to be the hyaluronic acid injection.

The Times

Three London fashion designers and their mums talk to The Times. First up is Tolu Coker and her mum, Olapeju:

Even as a little girl Tolu had an eye for intricate styling. There was a time when she was small that a friend took her to a party and thought she’d lost her on the dancefloor. Of course, Tolu had just transformed her outfit — removing her jacket to reveal a sparkling disco top underneath.

Growing up in Nigeria gave me the privilege of having many of my clothes custom-made. I come from a creative family and creativity has always influenced the way I dress. I also enjoy making my own garments and designing jewellery to complement them. This allows me to choose quality fabrics and materials while creating pieces that genuinely reflect who I am. It brings me immense joy to think that this might have influenced Tolu.

The Times

A different way to get to the US it seems:

Six Nigerian nationals linked to an organized criminal network that allegedly swindled American women out of over $6 million through online romance scams will be extradited to the United States on Friday, South African police said.

The men, who were arrested in the South African city of Cape Town in 2021, are set to be handed over to officials from the FBI on Friday and transported to the U.S. to face wire fraud and money laundering charges.

They are accused of belonging to a criminal network known as the Black Axe, which Interpol describes as being part of criminal groups responsible for a significant share of the world’s cyber-enabled financial fraud, typically through romance scams, cryptocurrency and investment scams.

According to South African police, the men are alleged to have targeted more than 100 women in the U.S., defrauding them of more than $6 million through online romance or love scams.

Among the alleged victims were pensioners and businesspeople who were reportedly targeted through sophisticated online relationships.

“Through the coordination of Interpol South Africa, the six will today be transported from a correctional facility in Cape Town to Cape Town International Airport, where they will be handed over to officials from the FBI and the United States Secret Service, who arrived in South Africa this morning,” said police spokesperson Katlego Mogale.

AP News

Le Monde feature on AbdulSamad Rabiu, one of Nigeria’s billionaire Instagram influencers:

His Instagram account reveals a life that is both deeply rooted and globalized. He is most often seen in a caftan and hula (a Hausa headpiece), receiving guests in his bright office with cream leather sofas, overlooking the lagoon in Lagos, the economic capital in the predominantly Catholic South. Or attending a flamboyant engagement ceremony, a favorite pastime of Nigeria's high society. Another day, he appears in a T-shirt, sneakers and cap, aboard his new Bombardier Global 8,000 jet – he was the first African to own one – or on his yacht, the Raniya, named after his youngest daughter. It is a life of opulence. On this account, he also describes himself as "Africa's biggest giver," highlighting the work of his foundation, the ASR Initiative, which allocates $100 million annually to education, health and development. "I don't think we are doing enough in terms of giving back," he told the Nigerian press a few years ago.

Le Monde

Uncle Chris Osagbaekhoe is now a graduate:

A 68-year-old grandfather from south-east London has graduated with a first-class degree in social work.

Chris Osagbaekhoe, from Thamesmead, gained his Bachelor of Arts (BA) from Goldsmiths, University of London at the Queen Elizabeth II Centre in Westminster, four years after starting his studies.

Chris, who was born and raised in Nigeria, had previously studied psychology and counselling between 2013 and 2015. He has four children and 12 grandchildren.

He said: “Part of the inspiration was to empower people to empower themselves, and part of the motivation was to be a voice to the voiceless – that was my inner drive.”

BBC

Do you care for some spag jollof? Joke Bakare has got you covered with a recipe:

There’s a long-standing tradition of pasta-making in northern Nigeria that’s sadly dying out as good-quality dried pasta becomes available. We’ve served a couple of pasta dishes in Chishuru, my restaurant – most recently gnocchi made with gram flour and flavoured with moringa, a nutrient-rich leaf, served with a caramelised yoghurt sauce.

For the 100th anniversary of legendary Soho restaurant Quo Vadis, my dear friend Nick Bramham of Quality Wines and I were asked to collaborate on a celebration dinner. Nick loves to cook Italian so we decided to do an irreverent Italy-meets-Nigeria dinner including spaghetti with jollof sauce. Jollof rice is one of the most famous dishes of West Africa – there’s a never-ending argument about whether Ghanaian or Nigerian jollof is better, I honestly don’t care. Anyway we took the sauce base of jollof and applied it to pasta. We didn’t invent this – it’s a popular late night snack dish in Nigeria – but it was Nick who christened it “spag jol”.

Observer

A truly unexpected twist to this story where Nigerian scammers helped to catch a paedophile in the UK:

A paedophile who was spotted by a passenger watching child abuse videos on a train to London also tried to buy a 13-year-old girl - and was paying for her in instalments.

David Johnson, 35, was caught viewing videos of young children being abused while on a train from Stafford to London on September 23, 2025.

Messages from a supplier read: ‘I got all videos. Don’t worry, sweetheart [I] supply all kinds of videos.[sic]’ The vile predator responded: ‘Just kids videos’.

But unbeknownst to him, a horrified passenger sitting behind him witnessed the disturbing exchange as well as the videos that followed.

After moving to another carriage, he alerted British Transport Police, who swooped in to arrest Johnson as soon as the train arrived at London Euston.

Officers seized his phone, which was found to have an indecent image of a child saved as the wallpaper, but the CPS said more evidence was required to charge him.

While in custody, brazen Johnson even asked officers for his phone back because he ‘needed to delete some stuff’.

Further analysis of 150 electronic items belonging to Johnson, where they uncovered nearly 200 indecent images, including 105 Category A pictures – the most serious.

In an episode of Channel 4’s 999: What Happened Next, it was also uncovered that Johnson was trying to buy who he believed was a 13-year-old girl named Lola.

[…]

Johnson had planned to meet the 13-year-old girl at her home on the day of his arrest and had condoms and a train ticket in his possession at the time.

Police went to an address in Wolverhampton where they believed Lola was living; however, people living there did not know anything about the child.

It was later uncovered that neither Lola nor Shanelle were real and were fake personas created by scammers in Nigeria to whom he was sending money.

Daily Mail

Here is the short version of a story that has been told wrong for 30 years.

Kenneth Nnebue was born in Mgbidi, Imo State. He left school after sixth grade and apprenticed under his brother, a handbag maker, before entering trade himself in the Onitsha market. By the late 1980s, he was in Lagos, importing VHS tapes from Taiwan, distributing pirated foreign films, and trying to move product in a difficult economy. When the tapes stopped selling, he put an original story on them instead. That story — Living in Bondage (1992) — cost 150,000 naira, about $7,000 at the time. It sold over 100,000 copies in its first weeks through informal markets in Lagos, Enugu, and beyond. It launched a global industry.

What gets left out of most tellings: before Nnebue made Living in Bondage in Igbo, he had already produced at least 27 Yoruba-language films. An Igbo trader, operating in Lagos, making Yoruba content, who then made the Igbo film the world decided was the beginning of everything. The ethnic ownership of that origin — who gets to claim Nollywood, which tradition gets the credit, which city gets the heritage tourism — has been contested ever since. Not because the evidence is unclear, but because resolving it requires someone to say plainly what Nollywood actually is: an art form rooted in Yoruba theatrical tradition, or an industry born from an Igbo trader’s logistics problem. These are different things. The confusion between them is not innocent.

The Yoruba side of the argument is not a retroactive claim. The Yoruba Traveling Theater tradition, Alárìnjó, reaches back to the 19th century. Its modern form is usually traced to Hubert Ogunde, whose touring theater company toured Nigerian cities through the 1950s and 1960s, its work politically sharp enough that a regional premier banned it outright. That stage tradition migrated to celluloid film through the 1970s and 1980s, and by 1985 Moses Olaiya’s Mosebolatan was one of the country’s first genuine blockbusters. Critically, Yoruba filmmakers moved onto VHS format in 1988, four years before Living in Bondage. If the question is who touched the video format first, it wasn’t Nnebue.

So why does his name carry all the credit? Because Living in Bondage wasn’t first, but it was the first to look like it knew what it was doing, packaged with a glossy, full-color cover styled after pirated Hollywood tapes, presented as a professional product instead of a stopgap. The story helped too — a man who joins an occult society and sacrifices his wife for wealth, only to be haunted by what he’s done — landed hard in a country deep in structural adjustment-era desperation, when stories of ritual money were part of the cultural air people breathed. And despite being shot entirely in Igbo with no subtitles for a full year, the film crossed ethnic lines anyway — co-producer Okey Ogunjiofor would later say simply that people who didn’t understand the language still understood the story, because the pictures carried it.

What Nnebue actually contributed, then, wasn’t the invention of video filmmaking — Yoruba practitioners had that four years earlier. He contributed a “template,” an industrial model of direct-to-video production that the entire industry would replicate for the next two decades. Every straight-to-video Nollywood film that followed, regardless of language, was built on the business logic Nnebue stumbled into while solving an unglamorous warehouse problem.

Laid side by side, these two histories aren’t actually contradictory; they’re answering two different questions. It’s the single phrase “who started Nollywood” that collapses them into one, forcing a false contradiction. The Yoruba lineage answers where the art form came from. The Nnebue story answers where the industry came from. Ogunde’s company built the grammar. Nnebue’s warehouse problem built the factory.

I’m writing this from Enugu, one of the cities where Living in Bondage first sold by the hundreds in market stalls. Here, Nollywood’s Igbo roots aren’t distant history but lived memory, passed down the way a family recipe is. That memory is real. So is Ogunde’s banned theater company. Neither one needs to lose for the other to be true.

But Nigeria rarely lets cultural origin stay this generous. Who started Nollywood is never just a historical question here — it’s tied to tourism revenue, festival programming, whose language gets state funding, whose grandchildren get to say “we built this.” Thirty years on, the debate hasn’t been resolved because resolving it was never really the point. Someone benefits from the ambiguity every time it stays open, and someone loses something every time it closes.

That, more than the biography of one trader from Mgbidi, is the story worth telling.